Counting

My sister Paige blogged the other day about counting her son's first steps. She had reached the number 66 while counting and her question was "Do I quit counting now?" Counting those chubby legged steps is so exciting. Throughout life we count up... to things like those 66 steps. The amount of years we were married, the number of meals we've made, the number of times we've moved etc. We count down to babies' due dates, Christmas celebrations, holidays birthdays etc. I've counted years that have passed since horrible events and years into the future to see how old I will be when my youngest is 10. The other day my son Darren had another seizure. As i watched him fade from chaos into sleep with wide-eyed non-responsive calm in between, the thought struck me... "This is something I don't want to count anymore." I'm done... but he's not.