Note to Self:

The computer screen in our house (thanks to the baby) usually greets me with a Google prompt of:

   " Your search - kkksikihsueh03hkomv dew - did not match any documents."    

The fridge freezer in our house has borne for a full week the "reason why" 4 yr olds should not put a pop can in the freezer and leave it there.  I know... i know... i gotta clean that up.

The black piano, covered in tiny fingerprints all over it's body, breathes a deep sigh of relief when it has completed 4 or so hours of "practicing" with all of the "music-box dancing"/ moonlight sonata/ jazzy-blues/ sunday morning worship...."just bang on it for fun and make up a song" frenzy that this house can muster.  I really need doors on the music room!

My fiddle players are becoming "VIOLINISTS" and that has meant endless attempts at "vibrato"
10 full minutes of  excercises in sustained vibrato while "shifting" higher and higher up the neck of the violin... followed by a short break before the next installment of vibrato... it's a little nerve wracking...especially on the higher notes.

There are newly purchased toilet plungers attached perpendicularly to the wall.

There are notes scattered around the house that the kids have been writing to the squirrels  ( a spring tradition)  And there are also notes written *from* the squirrels.  :) I may run out of printer ink with all the pictures of squirrels being printed off....

I didn't clean our room... or even make our bed. 
I didn't clean the bathrooms.
I didn't wash the floors.
I didn't....

So what is the point?  Well...I am high stress and so many days i go to bed thinking.. "Well, all we accomplished today was a messier house!  ....But i want to be more positive!  I want to be more *appreciative*...and i know i have the tendency to believe that nothing i do (or am)  is good enough... but it's a heavy thing, and i think i am passing that on to my kids.  So this is my "note to self" today... (sitting in bed with a migraine.)

 My house is absolutely fast paced and kinda messy during the day... but I don't want  those to be the only things I remember about these years. so...

 Here's what *else* happened today: 

We did get school done for 5 kids... well, 1/2 done... i never feel done.
I drove Carrie to physio.
Ellie taught Wes how to ride his bike with no training wheels in the heated garage.  (We had freezing rain and snow today.)
Robin wrote a letter to her cousin....and used a dictionary for corrections.
I made 4 loaves of bread, 2 batches of buns and 6 pizzas with the "help" of a few little people.
About 3?, 4? loads of laundry were cleaned and put away, 2 or 3 loads of dishes were done... (another is waiting)
I was able to answer emails and organize music to lead worship this weekend and go over it with my "strings".
The kids caught 3 wild rabbits to "give" to the children's intern as a belated birthday present. 
I had a "heart to heart" with my 13 year old.
I read most of Exodus.
Prayed into all the cracks and crannies of my days for two friends. One an old college friend and one a baby, both seriously sick and in the hospital.
I kissed and hugged.
Wes helped "decorate" the pizzas.
I snuggled baby. (and that COUNTS!)
And then i layed down on the couch and begged for silence for my migraine...
and i felt like a failure. 
Why? 
One of my favourite worship songs comes to mind just now as i type and maybe i need to sing it more often in the quiet of the evening (when i'm not in pain)....because when i sing it to HIM it is so powerful to me that HE is so totally ENOUGH...and there is tremendous relief in that thought. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHEm-b4IRYk

-enough-

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
Worth living for
And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You're my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
You're the coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough for me